we've missed some time.

There are moments in my life in which I wish I had stepped back to take in the moment.

When my first boyfriend asked me out.
When my first boyfriend broke my heart.
When I found love again.
When I walked across the stage at my graduation,
When I decided to move 4 hours away from home.
When I fell in love yet again, realizing I left him behind.
When I recieved my acceptance letter for school.

I never bothered to realize that these moments in my life not only affect me, but those around me.

I've been gone for a while mostly because I have been really sick, busy with school and then traveling home for christmas holidays. I enjoy being home but it's missing two things, people actually. Two people who meant a lot to me but in one way or another the friendship got messed up. It doesn't feel the same. One of them I'll forgive eventually and we will be friends, but not how we used to be. The other is just going to stay out of my life, it's easier.

Happy? I got a keyboard for christmas and there are a couple songs I have started learning, I do a bit at a time and leave it alone for a couple days while I attempt other songs. I love it. I also got some warm mittens and slippers. I am straying with my best friend while I'm home because I have to do a work term at a rehabilitation center here in town, and they live within waking distance.

Things are good, Things are bad.

I always want to leave, that has never changed.
and now I must go and learn New Born by Muse